They are soldiers fighting a war they did not choose. They are heroes.
Great post, Emma. Such an important topic viewing survivors and victims as normal/ordinary people who deserve safety, support, and justice for their resilience ❤️
Emma Katz, you are a living legend! I watched online your amazing presentation last week at the Ending Coercive Control Conference in Sydney. It was so important to have you there (virtually even) because of your unique examination of the Mother-Child dynamic and relationship is so crucial to the broader issue and one that is relatively underdeveloped and not well understood. Of course it fitted perfectly into the agenda of the conference, and many of the people around me commented at the break about how useful your presentation was :)
Keep it coming - and know that it is breaking new ground globally in fact!!!
Well, now I'm crying. The isolation and betrayal are the hardest things. Only my wonderful second husband and my mother seem to care about the horrors I have faced and am continuing to face. I wish I could get other people in my life to read this. I have felt like a half person going through life, trying to act normal and not seem weird, hiding the terror I am constantly experiencing. Reading this, I feel so seen, and am just weeping now. This does feel like a war I never wanted to fight, and I still have four years to go, at minimum. I've been already in it for 16 years, and I grew up with a coercively controlling father on top of that. I just want to live in peace, and I am so angry anytime someone assumes that I am contributing equally to this conflict, or that I want it to continue.
I’ll keep saying this, the UK civil courts need this guidance at the moment CC is understood in the criminal courts but very rarely do you find a UK family court judge taking this seriously - what an excellent piece of work and endorsement for all those living through/surviving CC. Thank you
Thank you for putting into words what so many of us are living. When I began sharing my truth, my abuser tried to silence me. When that didn't work, he tried shaming me. That too will not work. I lost much but escaped with my life and my voice. I now use both to advocate for legislation to expand the definition of domestic abuse to include coercive control. Abusers don't change, so laws must change to protect victims.